Auchentoshan 1991 31 Year Old Whisky Sponge No.84

Auchentoshan is, of course, usually rather boring and flimsy. However, this cask displayed an abnormal abundance of ripe fruits, honey, dried flowers and even soft waxy notes. In other words, loads of lovely, slightly old school, mature malt whisky character. Probably the best Auchentoshan we’ve ever tried, largely by virtue of being not too much like Auchentoshan.

If you are a fan of Auchentoshan, please be aware, this whisky may have too much flavour and charisma for you.

Tasting notes by Giuseppe Linguini

Colours: Instaneous notations of luxury eau de vie, time pie, dark fruits concentrating on difficult essay and molecular pleasantness moving into a custard blanket. Lashings of mashings and snippets of nineteen nineties. Like to get into sleeping bag filled with lemming curd and pretend you are a special pastry by enigmatic and hyped French Patissier.

Tastings: Goes down like shed balloon! Superlative mushroom novel, centrifuged kimquat, dessicated aubergine with special philosophy jodhpurs. Level of extreme satisfaction like to be watching Vladimir Putin receive death by dandruff. Same feelings of age as Last Of The Summer Brine. Lasting impressionisms of rare and overpriced teabags.

Finishings: Continues on like Election Night coverage on BBC 1.

Stars out of 100 . . . 92! (Like to be walloped in eye-faces by Edinburgh Hogmany celebrations against own will.)